Unwritten Pages of the New Year

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Picture: Lakshmi-goddess of prosperity & Ganesh-god of wisdom and overcomer of obstacles; ushering you into the New Year.

 As I think of this coming new year I picture opening a new book, or a fresh unmarked page upon which to write, perhaps sitting in a theater waiting for a performance to begin. There is openness, a hushed expectation, curiosity, and a desire to know what the supreme Author will scribe, say or do in your life. The start of anything can seem exciting, tenuous and uncertain, all at the same time.

 Through the years, we can become over-familiar with life, and in doing so we lose many precious qualities: becoming dulled to life’s wonders, entrenched in sameness, hypnotized by fear, lack, self-condemnation, or enmeshed in bitterness. These are life killing tendencies and suck joy right out of us. These perspectives are simply states of mind, as demonstrated by the fact that the person next to us, with very similar circumstances can have a completely different and elevated attitude.

 The very root of this universe is Ananda; it is an explosion of joyful-bliss. And life, when lived in God, is filled with divine Presence. No matter how far we wander from our Source, it never stops being the essence of who and what we are; this is a fact. It has been a source of great mischief that religious leaders invented eternal hell and damnation. Reason tells us that God, being the creator of all, and is more loving than the most devoted parent, will never abandon His children, never! We are made in His likeness and His image, therefore we are eternally His.

 The real question then, is how to consciously re-establish that connection? For that, we have been given the truth by living spiritual masters, and we have received the means to practice the very highest methods for realizing God by our Guru-lineage. Mental speculation is but a vague shadow compared to the light of realization. To step into that light, we must strive with all of our might; with great courage we must step out of the shadows and be illumined.

 Sri Yukteswarji assured us that all of us have had a trail of misdeeds littered behind us, but that should not stop us in striving for Self-realization. But, neither will spiritual laziness get us to the Goal. I have devotees tell me that they have no time for meditation because they play golf each morning, some who wish to drink alcohol or use drugs, others are driven by the need to socialize with friends, watch television or surf the net—there are a million excuses. But, there is one compelling reason for knowing God—it is only through oneness with Him that we can have lasting happiness; a fulfillment that does not diminish with time nor is severed by the death.

 As aspirants, we continue to live in the body–in this world. As such, there are things we must have for the survival of this body: clothing, shelter and food, at times we need medical care, for many who have taken on the responsibilities of family the list grows longer. So, we work to have balance in our lives–there are legitimate desires to fulfill living in this material realm. For some it is completing education, excelling in a profession, building a business, or raising a family. Looking to the new year we can take into account the many aspects of life—material as well as spiritual.

 Create a clear picture of who you want to be and what you want to accomplish–for every creation begins with an idea. Putting yourself into that picture, feel what that is like: the sense of self-mastery, the balance, peace, bliss, wisdom, the whole package. Think also of accomplishing what you have come to do in this world: service to humanity and the fulfillment of your dreams. Expand your consciousness to comfortably and easily accommodate your dreams–definitely invite God in to be co-creator with you. Remember, you are made in His likeness and His image; there are no limits to what He can do through you.

 Blessings, blessings for the unwritten pages that will be filled with the unfolding days of this new year, and that you be a perfect conduit for the supreme Light of this world to manifest through your every thought, word and action.

Papa’s Sannyas

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Picture: Swami Ramdas; a perfect flower of full God-realization

On a Wednesday night of March, 1974, I met Mother Hamilton. In addition to the tremendous talk she gave that evening she also led us in chanting Ram Nam. I found Mother’s tune haunting but unforgettable and found myself singing it after meeting her. When I chanted Om Sri Ram Jai Ram Jai Jai Ram (Victory to God), it started a vibrational feeling, something powerful and uplifting that soon gave me peace and bliss.

It took some time before I came to know details of Swami Ramdas; first from Mother’s talks describing her time with him, her reading from the Vision Magazine most every talk, then finally when I read his books. In 1979 Mother announced the new publication of the Gospel of Swami Ramdas which included generous excerpts of Mother’s and Papa’s (Swami Ramdas) talks from 1957. It was obvious what a powerhouse of God Papa was; he started Mother into the Mystical Crucifixion, it was he and Master who spiritually protected her all the way to her full God-realization.

I found every written word from Papa was saturated with truth and wisdom and lifted me closer to the goal. The Ram Nam chant continued in me down through the years as an essential part of my spiritual practice. I did not have a voice that could sing for very long, so after a few repetitions verbally I switched to mental chanting; it was not till later that I read that Papa recommended mental chanting, saying it was more powerful. Papa grew into an absolute fixture in my life. His Ram Nam chant, his perfectly expressed wisdom, humor, openness, love of God and God in humanity were, and are, inspiring beyond mere words. How blessed I am to have him in my life.

December 27, we celebrate Papa’s Sannyas Day–the day he put on the orange swami clothes (as Ram willed him to do), and committed himself to the life of a wandering sadhu with the new name of Swami Ramdas–meaning servant of God. With that inauguration came a great movement of love of God and perfect surrender to Him into the world. Papa very rarely recommended the sannyas life to others; what he wants for all aspirants is perfect surrender and non-attachment to things of the world. As Papa said, “sannyas is principally a state of internal detachment to the objects of the senses. The external garb is only a symbol of inner transformation.”

The simplest means to have non-attachment is to have a total focus on, and surrender to, God—by making Him first in your heart, mind and soul. Be a faithful lover of God, chant His name all the hours of the day, feel His bliss surging throughout your entire being, and you will be His, and He will be yours. Non-attachment to this world and perfect comprehension of the universal vision of God makes for pure happiness no matter your situation. Whatever color clothes you wear, you will then have the orange flame of renunciation burning brightly within you; you will be purified, so that within and without there is nothing but Ram. By striving for and attaining this exalted state, you perfectly honor Papa’s Sannyas Day.

 “Mere external renunciation is of no avail… To assume Sannyas in the hope that by taking merely that step you would realise God, is perfectly wrong…… Sannyas is not a thing to be received from, or given to, anybody. It is a dedication of our entire being to the Lord and His service. It is a spontaneous wave of aspiration rising from within our own heart.”

Swami Ramdas

Christmas Morn’

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 These early Christmas hours feels very sacred, the air vibrating with Aumen–a celestial song of the Infinite. The Christmas tree lite, and tiny lights all around the crèche scene on the fireplace mantel.

 As I stand and gaze at the images of the dear holy family, I touch the feet of the blessed baby Jesus. A thrill of Divine Presence captures my soul. A powerful surge thrills throughout every cell of my body. I stand enraptured for some time. Then my attention is drawn to the Holy Mother, and compassion for what she must have gone through humanly, the strain and stress of travelling when so fully pregnant, the uncertainties she had faced, the surrender of her soul, the handmaiden of God—all come flooding into me.

 Gradually my attention swings to Joseph, again on a human level, the sense of family responsibility and the uncertainties. His intuition told him his soon to be wife was pure. His intuition would take the little family to far away Egypt to protect them, and tell him when it was safe to return. A man of strength, courage, conviction and perfect faith.    

 Then I looked at the angel blowing her horn in celebration, in joy and sounds of bliss! Yes, a night to celebrate, God with us! And the wise men, certainly saints and sages all—men of transcendent vision. They bow at the feet of a baby, in perfect submission to the Divine child. And the shepherd boy, coming without the understanding of the wise men, but in the simplicity of childlike love and faith. All have a place in this pageant of Light and Love come to the world; the redeemer of mankind and a blessing to all.

 Then my vision is drawn to the picture of Mother, looking at the holy scene as from above. Born on Christmas day, a birthdate-harbinger for the life she was to live—a Christ-like life. She too would suffer, not be understood, would strive for, and be loyal to God to the very end. A lover of Truth, a servant of her Guru through thick and thin. That life is now over Mother, and now you reside in the great heavens, serving all, even as you served on earth. Happy birthday Mother! I surrender at your feet.   

 And you, my dear Ones, may you also feel this warmth of love and sacredness of Christmas; a happy day filled with Divine remembrance and wonder-filled activities.

With all love and blessings,

David

 

The Eve of Christmas

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 Have a blessed Christmas Eve. It is a remarkable time, for many it includes family, for all of us it is a time to tune-in to the Divine emanations resounding within and without.

 It is touching to think about that historical night when Mother Mary suffered while travelling on a donkey or walking on foot as they made their way to Bethlehem. Then, to find no room to stay, in those days it was not an inn as we think of it, but a walled enclosure, open to the sky overhead. However, even these were filled to overflowing. But kindness won out as they were directed to a cave used as a barn. The humble beginnings of God born in man; a cave so entirely appropriate for a Yogi-Christ.

 It is also entirely fitting to meditate upon the inner drama of God born in man. While it is true that all mankind has the Christ-seed within, for most of humanity it lies in potential only. For aspiring souls that seed awakens, sending out branches to the Light, roots deep into the Soul. It is the tree of life that is growing right within us! New growth captures new Light, new revelations and ever-new bliss.

 This is mankind’s next evolutionary step; and it occurs within the devoted individual, and as more individuals burst the shell of humanness a forest of Christ-like souls will inhabit this earth—bringing a new era of peace and fulfilling mankind’s greatest potential. What we celebrate tonight is the tremendous potential embedded in you, me, and in all. This is the eve on which it all begins.   

 

Attaining Needed Velocity

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Picture: Master attained needed velocity! Flower arrangements by Rebecca H.

The after-effect of this past weekend of Christmas celebration continues to be with me. The feeling of warmth, love and delight at coming together: caroling in Christmas, communion with our Beloved, friendship and a delectable potluck—all combined to be a feast for the soul.

Certainly, devotees coming together in Satsang to commune with Truth, the eternal Being, is of tremendous help for our spiritual practice. Traditionally this is done when we come together as a group to focus upon God alone. However, the inner meaning of Satsang is fulfilled anytime you are merged in God; then there is association through oneness with Sat: the great I AM.

How to describe what living in Him, and He in me, is like? There is only He, the Divine Consciousness that is the eternal Substance, all power and all intelligence—everything there is! I do remember my life before living in Him, I remember the pain of being separate from God. Also, through my sadhana years I know the times of being with God alternating with the loss of connection with Him. To be in continuous communion with the Divine is categorically different from those previous states; a type of quantum leap. It is important that we keep the Goal of goals in the forefront, so that we do not stop short of experiencing Him deeply and continuously.

When Master was told by his guru that he had discovered God, Yogananda protested that he did not think that he had. Sri Yukteswarji went straight to the heart of the confusion: God-realization is not the attainment of miraculous powers—it is ever-new joy. We all love to have God come in super-ordinary ways, but really, miracles are small potatoes compared to exploring His vast Being. The real touchstone of God-experience is blissful joy.

How to add velocity to your spiritual practice so that you may fully realize the Divine Presence within and without? We have been given the very best tools to gain the highest consciousness: Kriya yoga meditation, chanting, keeping your mind on God, serving Him in all you do and in whom all you meet, and divinely loving Him is all-inclusive and propels you to ultimate fulfillment as a modern house-holder yogi.

I have had nothing but growing admiration for Babaji’s Kriya Yoga as taught by Master—with the perspective of over 40 years of practice since my initiation by my blessed Guru. I know of no other practice that works so directly with the spine and the brain for the evolution of all three bodies: the physical, astral and causal. The deeper we go in our practice, the more profound are the changes that occur in the subtle spine through breath, focus of mind and transformative life-energy. We are truly blessed for the intelligent design that has gone into this practice and provides for perfect balance.

To accelerate all areas of your spiritual practice you must hone your ability to focus on the Goal. Two great drivers in my sadhana was the need to know the truth, and, to experience bliss; these were not just casual ideas, but were constant needs that rendered all other desires distantly archaic. To add propellant to your aspiration for God you must have a compelling aspect of God that you cannot live without.

To break out of the earth’s gravity a rocket must attain the speed of 25,000 miles per hour. To break the gravity of earthly attachment you must necessarily travel at the speed of God! Which can only be attained by His booster rocket of Grace. You draw Grace to yourself when you love the Lord thy God with all your heart, mind, strength and soul. Attain the velocity you need by finding that part of God you must have beyond all other desires. Then, He cannot stay away, but will be drawn irresistibly by the magnet of your love—breaking free of earthly bonds and floating free in His truth and His bliss.

Was It a Year Ago-Or a Lifetime Ago?

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 Just a year ago I had been diagnosed with melanoma that had travelled to the small intestines and was thought to be in some of the lymph nodes; I had an operation that removed part of the small intestines and was still quite weak from the previous internal blood loss. A little later in the year I was to visit the hospital again with a resection of the liver due to more melanoma, and the removal of the gallbladder. These have been interesting times!

 Thanks to modern medicine these tumors were removed; what I am sure would have been a death sentence in times past when less advanced medical science was available. And thanks to the many prayers and powerful thoughts of so many wonderful souls my recovery was quick, smooth and complete.

 Last night we had our annual Christmas carols at Jill and Greg’s, a year ago on the same day I was just being taken by wheelchair to the door of the hospital and into the car for Carla to drive back to Camano. Was that a year ago—or was that another lifetime ago? The memory seems like a dream from the night that loses validity with the dawning of the day.

 Today, I feel very well. Today there is no sign of disease. With firm instructions to this body to effectively fight off any future ungoverned growths! Today God is fully present, even as He has been throughout this past year. I truly feel that one of the effects of your prayers and the spiritual work we do is that there is no leave-over, no clinging emotional charges from the events of the past year.

 One of the blessings and the curses of the intelligence God has given us as human beings is that we can anticipate future events as well as remember past events as if they are occurring in the moment. If these are useful or pleasant anticipations or memories, then they are blessings. However, if they are not useful and unpleasant, then this faculty of mind becomes a curse. In body memory, such as PTSD, nightmarish dreams, or in waking daydreams these daemons of thought can make life a living hell.

 A product of realizing God is to naturally live in the moment. The past is a river whose waters have flowed by and returned to the ocean–something to be remembered, but is now given back to God. The future is in the Infinite’s hands, and if there are concerns for what may come, then faith, trust, and reliance upon the Supreme gives peace in the moment.

 So, in celebration of this sacred season we gathered together to sing Christmas carols, so many beautiful and favorite songs that are kept in a special treasure box to be opened and enjoyed only at this time of year. So many loving dear friends all come together, with delicious treats to taste and warmth and love to share. This morning there is a dusting of white snow covering everything as if the world is wrapped in snowy giftwrap. Later we will have our Christmas Service, and more invocations for God-consciousness to be part of everyone’s awareness—for peace on earth, goodwill toward all mankind.

 So, if you are here, part of these wonderful, sacred events, or you are in distant places, I earnestly wish you peace, an inner assurance that God is with you and guiding you, and that you feel the warmth and love of association that, in God, effortlessly connects us all, wherever we may be, anywhere around this globe, or beyond.  

Freshly Born Truth

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Picture: 3rd Super Moon this year setting over Saratoga Straights-self evident to all who have clear skies and are awake to see it.

There are certain universal truths that, whether they are practiced or not, those with at least a modicum of intelligence and reasonably good hearts accept as true. Wisdom is usually simply put, but reaches to the heart of the matter. Its breach of practice causes untold mischief in the world that leads to unnecessary suffering. One such truth is the Golden Rule: Treat others as you wish to be treated. Perhaps there is no greater guide to good behavior than this. Imagine a world in which this rule is observed by one and all!

Then there is Swami Ramdas’ creed of universal love and service. Putting into place this maxim brings hearts and minds together in marching toward the fulfillment of what mankind is really intended to be. Universal love and service is not a difficult idea to understand, only its practice requires self-mastery—your little self that leads you to anger, greed and fear needs to be replaced with pure perception of seeing that the world is God.

Jesus quoted ancient texts when he said that the greatest law is to love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, mind and strength, and the second law, which is like the first, to love thy neighbor as thy self. Oh goodness, putting this into practice solves every human and spiritual problem of humanity and leads all to the kingdom of heaven.

Babaji said that humility is pleasing to the Lord above all other qualities. Lahiri Mahasaya said to solve your problems through meditation; exchange unprofitable religious speculation for actual God-contact. Sri Yukteswarji said to forget the past, the vanished lives of all men are dark with many shames. Human conduct is ever unreliable until anchored in the Divine. Everything in the future will improve if you are making a spiritual effort now. Master poetically summarized his life of devotion and realization in the words, God, God, God. And Mother encapsulated all spiritual practice with the teaching, keep your mind on God.

We really do know what we should do. As followers of this path we have been given the highest, most powerful principles and techniques for spiritual evolution, for ourselves as well as for the world at large. It is up to each one of us to fulfill the vision that Jesus, Babaji and all the Masters have for us. We may not be able to force the world to be how we would like it, but we can change ourselves, and therefore be agents of change for others.

Let us put the universal truths we do know to work; not delay even a moment. Meditation is a keystone, for it is in turning the mind inward that we touch the hem of God, and through that proximity we are purified and these universal truths then spontaneously live themselves through us. Thus, we find confirmed through our own experience, those truths we have sensed for so long are directly revealed by the Author of all life—and are freshly born in us.

The Love of Divine Mother

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 Picture: Ganga Ma with hand extended in blessings, a manifestation of Divine Mother.

Master and Papa both worshiped God as Divine Mother; Jesus and Mother were more focused on God as Heavenly Father. Since God is both personal and impersonal, you may conceive of God in any way that draws you closer to Him.

 There are those who relate most easily to Jesus, others to Krishna, and some relate to their teacher/guru–such as our own dear Mother. What is missing in the West, due to Jesus’ and the Jewish tradition of focusing on Heavenly Father, is the part played by Divine Mother (even though the word Holy Ghost is feminine, still it does not tend to evoke that part of ourselves that relates to sacred Mother). Although, for Catholics, Mother Mary is looked to for compassion and divine intercession. 

 Both Papa and Master felt that Divine Mother drew one closer than Father. A mother accepts her children more easily and unconditionally than a father–looking after the detailed needs of her dear ones. As Papa wandered a penniless sadhu all over India he had countless experiences of Divine Mother looking after him with such tender care. Whether it was providing what he needed for food, safety, or shelter, Divine Mother was so loving and protective of her dear child, Ramdas.

 For Master, it was Divine Mother who drew him unto Herself. With the death of his mother when he was but a child, he deeply mourned for her—only increasing his ardor for finding the love of Divine Mother. Master Mahasaya, a great soul who was disciple of the remarkable Ramakrishna Paramhansa, helped open the doorway for Master getting firsthand experience with the Divine Mother. He received Her blessed assurance that She had ever loved him, and it was She that he saw behind the eyes of his own mother.   

  Now, God made us in His likeness and Image, and that includes those aspects that are feminine as well as masculine. God loves to sport as those manifestations that delight us and draw us closer. So, Infinite Spirit expresses Itself in unlimited ways, and happily responds to our deepest yearnings. Here on earth, Divine Mother is a much-desired form that may manifest in any number of expressions in India, Quan Yin (Guanyin) in China, or numerous variations the world over; as Her expressiveness knows no limit.  

 In your spiritual journey, feel that God is looking after you as a solicitous mother would look after her child. Divine Mother is ever anxious that you be safe and comforted; that you know you have Her eternal love. Whatever you fill your mind with, you draw unto yourself. Feel the tenderness and love of Divine Mother; have full awareness She is ever looking after you. Look into those soft, melting eyes and know She has ever loved you. Let Her solace ever make you know that you are Her child—that you are in Her, even as She is in you.   

 Note: I continue to be deeply indrawn, however in the paradox of Spirit I feel my closeness to you more than ever. Communing with the eternal One, let us know that we are ever joined in Divine union through our Heavenly Father, Divine Mother.

 

Food for the Soul

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Swami Satchidananda gives Prasad (blessed food) to little boy on my lap, while little girl pronams Swamiji. [Photo by Chad; 2007]

Our eating habits can teach us many valuable life-lessons about living in the world. Food is a powerful part of people’s lives; our relationship with food is something we must encounter many times throughout the day. To find peaceful, healthful relations with food is not only good for the body, but also for the mind and soul as well.

Life-Lessons

When we eat to excess we suffer the consequences: we feel uncomfortable afterwards, it makes us lethargic, if done recurrently it adds to our weight and ultimately it makes us sick. Why do we do it then? Many times, we do not consider the consequences, but are only caught up in the desire to eat more and more in the moment. The life-lesson: always consider the after-effect of any action you do. After-effects are much better indicators of the beneficence of any action than how it feels initially. There is a saying, when you are faced with a decision, do what is more difficult; it is usually the right choice.

Another lesson from our relationship with food is the fact that many of the foods we crave are the wrong foods for us to eat. It seems a betrayal of the body to want those things that are injurious rather than salubrious. A child may eat something sugary for the first time: the eyes light up, a smile erupts and a request for more, please. Some people say they have a chocolate addiction; I say eat all you want, if it is sugar-free chocolate—there are few takers! When something is too good, it is likely not good for you. Oh this body, simply a nest of troubles! The life-lesson: be moderate—and be cautious of those things that feeds desire nature.

In our modern world products come in big packages and with great flair—meant to be consumed in extraordinary quantities. Super-sized packaging of food leads to super-sized bodies to match! Bigger is not better, certainly not better for you. Think about the actual size of your stomach and intestines, then think of how much we cram into them to be digested. It is truly amazing how much abuse our body endures, oftentimes without great complaint for many years. Life-lesson: rather than getting things because they are super-sized, that bigger is better—think about what the right-size is for you.

We can consume food without being conscious of tasting what we are eating, only taking mouthful after mouthful. To take in food with appreciation may sound like the opposite of what a spiritual person should do, but when you combine consciousness of good taste and awareness of the high quality of the food, and sprinkle it with a keen gratitude to the Giver of life and all good things, then the act of eating is spiritualized. Life-lesson: be conscious of the beauty in your life with a spirit of gratitude to your Infinite Beloved—in this way you appreciate and spiritualize all of life’s activities.

With the Holidays in season we can give “treats” to ourselves to the point of making this body sick. Hypocrites said, let your medicine be food, and your food medicine.  Life lesson: Let all the activities of your body, mind and spirit be what is best and for highest in you, and through the law of cause and effect good things will come to you. What you give up in the moment can pay dividends in years to come. The law of reciprocity works for both the harmful things not done, as well as positive thoughtful words and deeds that are done. I am sure you agree, meditation stands right at the top of that list of treats, through which you imbibe the highest quality food for the soul.

Make this season a true celebration of all that is good, beneficial and uplifting. Treat yourself to the greatest gift in life, communion with God. In that, you may feast without limit with only good consequence. Learn life’s lessons,  be wise in all things and find true happiness.

Photo: Prasad given for Mother’s Mahasamadhi Anniversary; 2007 Anandashram

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A Most Excellent Result

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Picture: Stained glass in the entry to the chapel at Providence Hospital–Gratitude to this greatest of Masters.  

We went in for my four month CT/PET scan. When I told Carla I appreciated her coming (as she has been to every appointment and stayed in the room after each operation), she said, “Where else would I be!”

 I am now familiar with the procedure for the PET/CT scan, a restrictive diet the day before, nothing to eat six hours before, all to make the body hungry for sugar. A concoction of a radium marker (which they assure me is mostly gone in a few hours) and sugar is injected and lights up areas of the body that absorb the sugar; and tumors love sugar, so if they are present they light up during the scan.

 The tech took three different pokes to get access to the blood system, I am told I am most difficult (having wiggly veins). He always talks for a good twenty minutes about his life (including pictures from his phone, as he is a special Ram edition!) before he gives me the radium, but eventually we get there. For about an hour I rest (not even reading) as the marker circulates through my system; wonderful meditation time.

 Then a short walk into a room with a large machine in it. I lie down on a narrow platform, strapped in and asked not to move, and then conveyored into a four foot deep tunnel with a few inches above me. Fortunately, I do not mind caves and enclosed spaces, in fact I rather like them. Asked beforehand if I want music played, I decline, again, an excellent time to meditate, besides, my mind can reproduce any music I know with stunning quality. The machine whirs as I am shuffled forward and back, slowly scanning up and down this body. After about an hour I am taken out and then I reverse my direction on the platform and once again I am enter the tube and more sound from the multimillion dollar PET/CT machine, as it does what it does. Twenty minutes or so later apparently I am fully baked and am given a hand up as I emerge from the procedure.

 Meanwhile Carla went to the beautiful little chapel that is provided by the Providence Hospital; a hospital founded years before by nuns, it continues to sport religious icons and prayers on walls throughout their buildings. Carla felt a wonderful support and presence of Mother and the Masters while meditating there. She then had the inspiration to call the doctor’s office; I was not able to get an appointment until the end of December, a long time to wait for results of the scans; as they tend not to give you the results until they see you in person.  The weather out has been turning cold and apparently some cautious souls decided not to keep their appointments out of concern it might snow—we could see the doctor later that afternoon! Carla said to me that this was only the outward reason given for their cancellations, she knew it was God who made all the arrangements.

 Normally it takes 24 hours to have a specialist read the results of the scan, but the nurse put in a call and we met with the doctor that very afternoon, he had the results in hand. After waiting for the doctor, he usually runs generously behind schedule, he came in to say that the scan was clear, no evidence of tumors; a very happy outcome (the second scan now that has come back clean). One reason he is so far behind scheduled time is that once he is with us, it seems he has no other place to be and we met with him for nearly an hour.

 We reviewed the scans, looking at the body as if from above the head, and with a movement of a mouse we view the spine and internal organs up and down at various layers, as well seeing the whole body from the front, and many other different windows to the internal workings of the body. The brain, kidneys, colon and liver all light up, as they readily absorb sugar. We could see the staples left by a previous surgery, a fascinating view of the internal body.  My original surgeon, who seems to have taken over my case, is a saint–he has a positive, healing presence and brims with intelligence as well as perpetual curiosity. I think it unusual that a surgeon would continue as a primary doctor with me now, but Carla has the thought it is because he finds something in us he likes (presumably more than my small intestines, liver and gallbladder resections and removals!).

 Afterwards we visit the chapel to give thanks and to be absorbed in His Presence. I tell God that I hope it is not due to attachment to the body that I feel this great joy, but He is bubbling up with blissfulness as we sit before His altar. I also thank so many of you who have sent prayers and notes of support and love. Science may have difficulty in quantifying the effects of prayer, but I have no doubt whatsoever that you have been essential in this time of physical challenges and that my smooth recoveries from major surgeries and multiple procedures have been made possible by your loving support—Thank You. And, for the grace and love I feel from God and the Masters, there is no end to my gratitude. Surely, and not just for this, my life has been blessed and my soul melts in gratitude.

 The only difficulty in what turned out to be a long day at the hospital is that the hours wore away and it became clear I would not be back in time for our Skype Service with the Ashland Group; I only hope they will forgive me for missing our time together, for what, I think, is for a good reason and a most excellent result.

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