Today marks the one year anniversary when Christine left the body. What stands out clearly is that when a soul leaves this earthly existence, it leaves a void that cannot be filled by anything or anyone; life is simply not the same, nor will it ever be.
As this realization deepens in me, it makes me more aware of how sacred life is; every life, everywhere. That search for the sacred, for divine healing was such a prominent feature in Christine, and what she inspired in many, many others.
Last night we held a Service for Christine: reading from the Resurrection of Sri Yukteswar, I spoke, we then chanted and held silence. While in silence I beheld Christine in a striking inner vision: She was near a large waterfall, there were lush flowers and foliage all around, all was lit with a beautiful, spring-like sun and peace rang in the air.
We communed in thought and in Spirit. My consciousness expanded like a geyser of radiance, transporting her into higher, more expanded awareness. As beautiful as the astral worlds are, they pale into insignificance in contrast to an experience in overarching Spirit.
Then for some time we were again next to the waterfall. She exuded light and a brilliant smile. She indicated that she would wish me to pass on her love to all, and for no one to feel sorry for her, that she is happy and free of bodily pain and restrictions. The feeling of light and happiness comes easily and joyfully as I think of her now.
How I started writing about Christine and what I have just now written seem to be two realities, a physical one in which Christine has left void of absence, and a spiritual reality in which she is ever-present and shining in a new world. Both are true, and while we deeply miss her, the greater reality is her eternal existence in God. This is the key to all healing around the physical death of a loved one; while acknowledging the loss, we may also know the eternal existence of the Soul.
What stands out to me in this moment is the tremendous feeling of love in my heart in thinking about Christine. And a feeling of fulfillment, that what she strove for in life, spiritual healing, has come to pass. Christine now has freedom from fear, and and has found joy; freedom from aloneness and separation, and is joined into oneness in Spirit; freedom from disappointment, and content in Divine Love; and now she has a playground of all astral creation, that more easily accommodates her vast desire to create beauty!
She earned all of these spiritual gifts by her relentless striving while here. Christine courageously faced her past demons, sometimes shaking and shuddering in the process, but never turning away from her path. And her expansive heart ever wanted to include everyone in the experience of growth; for she believed in, and eventually came to know, the real freedom and the lasting happiness that comes with bravely facing darkness in order to know the Light. This courage and tenacity for growth is what stands like a monument in Christine for all to emulate and follow.